Ask Mads anything—answering your questions and giving advice with all the wisdom of a broke English major.

On Dropping Out, Joining The Circus, and Our Media-Influenced Minds

Q: Dear Mads- I like school and all.  But I dunno if I like like school, ya know? 

Do you ever wish you could drop out and take a road trip and start a band and give up all your hopes and dreams of being a 9-5 contributing member of society for the sake of fulfilling the desires of your youthful, angsty, self?

At what point is it too late?  Is there a dollar amount for the maximum debt you can accrue and still survive without your degree? – David K.

A: Yes, yes, YES. I look at my bank account and think, “Not too shabby”, and next thing I know I’m imagining purchasing a teardrop trailer in which to travel across the continental United States. I could work odd jobs and do a bit of dumpster diving. I’d go to Nebraska and listen to old men in diners tell me about the war and what it was like back in their day or I’d go to New Mexico and charge tourists to listen to my Roswell conspiracies. I could join the circus (do those still exist?) or become a personal assistant to some high-power fashion CEO and endlessly submit my photos to exhibitions around the country. Every day it sounds more and more appealing. But, I’ve also asked myself, “When is it too late?”, and what I’ve come up with is that it’s never too late. I know, sounds corny—but really. Why not get a degree? We’ve already made it this far and if you’re doing something you love or at least something that’s interesting to you, then there’s no way to lose. Get a degree and try Plan A, try contributing to society. Maybe it’s everything you dreamed it would be and you’ll start a family and live happily ever after. Or maybe you’ll hate it, then you and your band can hit the road. But you’ll still have an education, which even if you’re not working 9-5 and doing something outside the norm, you’ll go farther with a solid education. Knowledge is power, my friend. Degrees don’t expire, so when you’re ready to retire from songwriting or lion taming or waitressing in the Big Apple, you’ll still have a degree as a safety net. If nothing else, you’ll know that you can survive things like finals week and long lectures and constantly being surrounded by new and vastly different people, and you’ll be better for it. There is always the option of things such as the Peace Corps which you could pursue after graduation, or even take a break to do. Studying abroad is another great way to satisfy your wanderlust while not giving up on your degree. So, stay angsty, my friend. But don’t forget the value of education either.

Q: Dear Mads- How does someone stay positive when there are such bad things happening in the world around them? I feel like every day I watch the news and there’s been another shooting or sexual harassment scandal or just something crazy! It’s like we’re getting desensitized and it makes me really sad sometimes when I think about it. I can’t avoid the news and honestly, it’s like a car crash so I can’t help but read even if I don’t want to. – Samantha B.

A: It’s a crazy world out there. Everyone is tired of the tragedy and corruption, but nobody wants to be uninformed, either. It’s easy to start drowning in the headlines and the heartache—I’ve been there. When you think about “the world today” then yes, it seems like it’s everywhere you turn. But if you look at your own life, is that still true? With all the tragedy happening, I still know a lot of joy. I know a woman named Crystal who has three kids and still manages to organize a meal for the homeless at the Paris Foundation every month. Last week, my church handed out flowers to strangers. My friend Carol talks to people she’s just met like they’ve known each other for years and always has a story to tell me about this guy walking down the street who lost his wife or this woman in the pizza shop who is struggling to provide for her children—she’ll listen for hours and is endlessly giving as much herself to others as she can. She gives until there’s nothing left and she never worries about running dry. There is good in the world, but good isn’t what makes news stations money. Good isn’t as dramatic or jaw dropping as tragedy is—it’s quiet and humble, and most likely right under your nose.

Maybe that’s not a good enough answer for you and you still can’t help but focus on the big picture, so here’s another angle. The world is so different now, then when our parents were kids. My parents always told me they would spend all day outside and they literally were not allowed to come home until the sun was setting. Obviously, that’s not happening anymore. “It’s not how it used to be”, as my gran says. The world is so different, we think it’s more dangerous. But is there any truth to that perception? Statistical research says no: murder rates are at a 50-year low. I know, I was surprised, too. The media is warping our view of the world around us– changing the way we walk down the street, or even causing us to lose hope in the world around us. I recently unsubscribed from The New York Times due to the constant bombardment of “Breaking News” notifications. Every day Trump was firing somebody or a Governor was accused of sexual harassment or there was another school shooting. Sometimes, as hard as it is to look away from the train wreck, you just have to unplug; delete Twitter, delete your news app, and just breathe. Count your blessings, pay for your friend’s coffee, volunteer at a homeless shelter, read a book and discuss it with somebody, take a walk, pay it forward in the drive thru, take time to be with yourself and the ones you love. I unwaveringly believe in love and mercy and justice, in the existence of those things in the people around you– all you have to do is look around. We are part of a generation of change, we feel each other’s hurts and we stand against what is wrong—that comes from a place of love.

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